Thursday 6 October 2011

Heatwave decorum

So, I gather it's quite hot at the moment?

Unusually, for Britain, we are having an exceptionally warm Autumn, at the moment, with temperatures in excess of 30ยบ at the end of September, and beginning of October.  Quite remarkable.  But let's not lose our heads, please…

Hot weather - at any time of year - is no excuse suddenly to act or look like a slob.  In the heat, people cease to care how they look, how they come across to others, what impressions they give.  And they are not ashamed; they do this with brazen impunity, and with barefaced disregard for all conventions of decency.

Nobody wants to see people walking down the street in revealing clothing which manages somehow to be both shapeless and far too tight, simultaneously.  Topless middle-aged men, their sweaty beer-guts gleaming in the sunlight, hair plastered to their chests with a combination of perspiration and cheap lager, waddling through town-centres in the middle of the day.

In winter, people retain some sense of style, and decorum.  They wear clothes with gravitas - coats, scarves, gloves.  But when the sun comes out, there is a wild notion that it has suddenly become acceptable to walk around with acres of ruddy bare flesh on show.

If the heat is making you uncomfortable - no one cares.  Please dress normally, and learn to bear the discomfort, rather than subjecting everyone else to your hideous summer wardrobe.