I am officially the funniest person at #EdFringe

Today, TV channel Dave announced the 'funniest joke of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival' - a joke by comedian Rob Auton, which goes like this:

"I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa."

Very funny.  I should know - I wrote this joke more than two years ago.

Admittedly, I didn't have the platform the the Edinburgh Fringe Festival to publicise my joke - I just posted it on Twitter - but as you can see, I was doing this joke as far back as March 2011:

I am going to make a bubbly milk chocolate bar, with a layer of sweet'n'sour sauce, and market it as a Chinese Wispa...
— Kit Marsden (@manek43509) March 26, 2011

In total, I have Tweeted the joke four times (three times publicly, once to drummer and producer Craig Blundell):

I will admit that Mr Auton's version is rather better worded (he is a professional comedian, after all) - but no one can really deny that this is, in essentials, the same joke.  And that I got there first.

Where's my prize?

Biscuit redesign

Chocolate digestives.  Everybody loves them.

But, there is an inherent design flaw in the world of chocolate-covered biscuits.  Here is how chocolate biscuits look at the moment:

As you can see, there is nowhere really to hold the biscuit, without touching the chocolate - when it will inevitably melt on your hands, leaving a sticky, chocolatey mess.

My proposed design adds two chocolate-free "handles" - one area on either side of the biscuit which allows the biscuit eater to hold the biscuit without getting chocolate on his or her hands.  To compensate for this loss of chocolate, the chocolate covering the rest of the biscuit is a thicker coating.

Here is how this would look:

I hope that all biscuit manufacturers will shortly put this new innovation into place, so that everyone can enjoy delicious chocolate digestives without getting melted chocolate all over their hands.

#Vlog: Cioko Cake comparisons

An unexpected twist in the Cioko Cake saga occurs, when a strange, unbranded imitation appears in a local rehearsal studio vending machine... Watch the video to find out more!